Update on Chinese Kung Fu Stewardesses

Because there are bunny pics.

Boob Tea

Important note for Beltane - China is hiring busty virgins to pick tea to nestle in their bosoms to give it a more feminine quality. Qualified C-bunnies can apply directly to me.

I dare you to ask for extra peanuts

Air Hong Kong teaching kung fu to stewardesses.

Bonus news photo of hot Asian chicks touching each other:

Bonus C-bunny names I am totally not making up: Lumpy and Rose (respectively).

Attention, ladies

I am a Chinese SWAT team member.

Just tossing out the bunny bait.

What up in Asia?

Chinese naked skiing.

Warning #1 - pic NSFW.

Warning #2 - lack of explicit C-bunny.

Solution to warning 2: Shu Qi

Chinese Leftovers

We wants one.

Additional gratuitous J-bunny pic:

China - land of innovation

And now - the boob clamp.

Do NOT miss the video if you're a fan of boobies and/or want to know what to get your sweetie for the next holiday.

New Bunny Awesomeness

No Trousers Day reaches Taiwan.

Men - prepare to become interested in cooking shows

Nude cooking show to air in Hong Kong.

Note - bunny pic in the link is borderline not work safe.

Update on International Piracy

Counterfeit laundry detergent.

Technology Surges Abreast

The Chinese electric boob jiggler stimulator.

And it works too! Just check out these totally legit before and after pics. Before:

After:

You'll notice that not only are her breasts larger, there are now seven of her. EXPONENTIAL WIN!

Note to C-bunnies - if you can't afford such a device, I will personally follow you around and jiggle your breasts for free.

Note - be sure to watch all 5+ minutes of the boobie-jiggling video.

No such animal

South Korea is blasting its own K-pop girl bands for being too sexy. Part of the issue is that Korea forbids using girls under 15 as sex symbols which conflicts with the Japanese maxim "younger is sexier" (current age of J-consent = 13). Naturally, in a country filled with women who the rest of the world think look like preteens when they're in their thirties, they have to sexualize the actual preteens (ref Saaya Irie, who began her entertainment career as a singer and 11yo bikini model).

And so I managed to work pedophilia into a quick Friday post. We'll see if this is still a comment magnet or if you've already gotten too bored to maintain your indignation.

Better Living Through Bunny

From Realliveman - being Chinese in Japan can get you bunny-laid (link is safe for work). Let us all practice saying the following:

私は中国人です。 (watashi wa chuugoku-jin desu)

And in other good news, my local Target pharmacy added another cute and tiny Asian-American pharmacist. I approve of the way they embrace cultural diversity. Now if they would just get rid of all the white, black, and brown people, and that Asian guy, their service would be perfect.

By way of apology for yesterday's long, whiny, and non-bunny post

China knows how to celebrate Christmas. And so does Japan:

Why Asia is cooler than your continent, reason #23865

Condom Santa Claus.

Also, another credit card has canceled my account due to filing for bankruptcy. That's another $10k+ of debt gone.

Taiwanese Women

They're hot...

And gullible. I like that combination.

And with this post, the Bunny tag becomes #1.

Because I have no time to do anything but follow the crowd

If anyone wants a brief example of how a Catch-22 situation works, just use my current predicament.
Doctor #1: “You need to exercise so you can get healthy.”
Doctor #2” “You need to get healthy before you can exercise.”

My company is now doling out all the O/T we can eat. In order to go green (read: be cheap), they cut the a/c and air recycling and other janitorial services on the weekend. The building smells old and musty almost immediately. If an elevator reeks of fart on Friday afternoon, it will not smell clean until Monday morning. This makes the bathrooms exceptionally nasty. On Saturday, I noticed that (based on the look and smell) someone had sprayed diarrhea into the urinal. I’m not kidding. Whenever I have my stomach attacks on the weekend, I go home to let it all out.

If one (and only one) good thing has come from being perpetually ill, it’s that I’ve had to spell “diarrhea” so often that I no longer have to look it up.

It sometimes amazes me how international our business has become. While sitting in Atlanta, I assisted a Korean employee who normally works in Australia, is on loan to Singapore, but is out on special assignment in Japan. It was a Chinese employee who first brought the issue to my attention. I wonder how the Italian food is there.

I’ve always thought things like the Academy Awards, where Hollywood awards Hollywood for doing the things Hollywood does for money, was akin to public masturbation but without the entertainment value, but it’s several notches above on the retard scale compared to bloggers handing other bloggers rewards (no, I’m not saying that because I haven’t won any). I already wrote about it here (and that link will also take you to the one, true bloggy award, which you just one, congrats and all), but to further drive the point home I have decided to award myself the thingy below.

It’s cute and pink and I stole it from another site and you will never get me to take it down until I feel like it. So, there – the system has been rendered invalid.

Bunny!

FAQs

Here answering some questions I've received over the eons.

1. Do you find all Asian women attractive?

Um...no. I just go out of my way to post pictures of the attractive ones. I'm funny that way.

2. Don't Asian women get boob jobs?

They do, and I find it just as unattractive on them as I do on Western women. I generally prefer natural to any sort of enhancement. Exception - all hair below the eyebrows can be shaved, waxed, and/or plucked.

3. Why do so many adult Asian women look like adolescents?

They don't. Although Japanese culture is arguably more youth-obsessed than ours (U. S.) and they often have models wear schoolgirl uniforms or other outfits normally reserved for teens, the problem is with you feckin' roundeyes. Your Western standards have become adjusted to chubby pre-teens who dress like hookers. I admit that when I first met my Japanese teacher, I wanted to raise my hand and ask "Are you sure you're not going to grow anymore, little girl?" (she was 31 at the time) But then I grew accustomed to the differences and now I can accept their women as beautiful even if they don't seem to be aging before my eyes and their nipples don't snag on their belt. If this offends you Westerners, I don't care - you'll be dead of a diabetic heart attack soon enough.

Let me know if I can clear up anything else.

Bunny Disclaimer

It has come to my attention that some of you do not properly appreciate the awesomeness that is hot Asian bunnies. Specifically, a lot of you pedophobes think their grown women are adolescent girls.

Hwang Mi Hee - age 27

I think the problem is our standards in America, especially here in the Bible and Fried Chicken Belt. I remember hearing comments about a guy's daughter who had a full figure by the time she turned twelve. There's nothing wrong with saying a young girl is pretty, but I think you edge over into creepy when you comment on how she's developing nicely. Some guys said she had arrived in full womanhood early, but the actual truth was that she was just stopping there on her way to morbid obesity, like the rest of her family.

Yuri Ebihara - age 29

Japanese women are the world's undisputed masters of longevity. That they do not spend their years lugging around a hundred pounds of double whoppers converted to sagging boobage may contribute to their longer, healthier lives.

Aki Hoshino - age 32

Here endeth the bunny lesson.

Final Answer

Answer #3 to the truth and lie meme.

I think Ebi-chan is the most beautiful woman in the world.

That one was a little yellow lie. She's my favorite model and the woman I think is 2nd most beautiful in the world. The most beautiful woman I've ever seen is my dentist. She's so stunning that she ALMOST makes me want to see her, but no, she's still a dentist. And she does have a web site with her picture on it, but I'm not linking because I don't want her to somehow discover my blog. Although I mean it in a completely complimentary way, a lot of Asian women seem to find the term "bunny" offensive, and she already sticks needles and drill bits into my head. I don't need her angry with me.

So, instead, here is another picture of Yuri Ebihara (エビちゃん, aka header bunny).

Bunny!