Tuesday, June 09, 2009
Because I have no time to do anything but follow the crowd
Doctor #1: “You need to exercise so you can get healthy.”
Doctor #2” “You need to get healthy before you can exercise.”
My company is now doling out all the O/T we can eat. In order to go green (read: be cheap), they cut the a/c and air recycling and other janitorial services on the weekend. The building smells old and musty almost immediately. If an elevator reeks of fart on Friday afternoon, it will not smell clean until Monday morning. This makes the bathrooms exceptionally nasty. On Saturday, I noticed that (based on the look and smell) someone had sprayed diarrhea into the urinal. I’m not kidding. Whenever I have my stomach attacks on the weekend, I go home to let it all out.
If one (and only one) good thing has come from being perpetually ill, it’s that I’ve had to spell “diarrhea” so often that I no longer have to look it up.
It sometimes amazes me how international our business has become. While sitting in Atlanta, I assisted a Korean employee who normally works in Australia, is on loan to Singapore, but is out on special assignment in Japan. It was a Chinese employee who first brought the issue to my attention. I wonder how the Italian food is there.
I’ve always thought things like the Academy Awards, where Hollywood awards Hollywood for doing the things Hollywood does for money, was akin to public masturbation but without the entertainment value, but it’s several notches above on the retard scale compared to bloggers handing other bloggers rewards (no, I’m not saying that because I haven’t won any). I already wrote about it here (and that link will also take you to the one, true bloggy award, which you just one, congrats and all), but to further drive the point home I have decided to award myself the thingy below.