Wednesday, November 05, 2008

Forty-four in a row, bitches!

The elections are over, thank the zombie jebus. People are saying it was a historic election, but to me it’s just more of the same because for the 44th time in a row, an American took the top prize. In your face, rest of the world! In fact, I don’t even think I’ve seen a foreigner make it to the semi-final rounds, unless you count Dennis Kucinich who clearly is from Uranus.

It’s kind of like how we Americans always win the baseball World Series. Even though it is a World Series, the Japanese have yet to take the title. We rule again!

Also, as a corollary to the fact that our next president will be black, all of you liberal wussbags crying about how this country will never ever ever elect a president who isn’t white are now kindly invited to STFU!

But next time I’m going to let race and my sympathy for the underdog factor in and I’m voting for a pair of Asian lesbian schoolgirls, regardless of party they represent and whether or not their platform includes mandatory root canals and exploratory anal surgery for all, plus death to every lifeform in the known universe.

Schoolgirl Bunnies!

10 comments:

Monogram Queen said...

So ..... i'll take that as a "you voted" yes?!

Joe said...

Is there any way that we can broaden that STFU mandate? Whoever can do that has my vote next time.

Tracy Lynn said...

Dude, you have totally used this picture before. That's just lazy.

NYD said...

If them two bunnies were on the ballot they would win in any erection.

PBS said...

Nice photo of your nominees for Prez and VP.

Enemy of the Republic said...

Yeah, we're badass.

Adrianne said...

What is to make me think you didn't vote for them?

Unknown said...

You are WRONG!!!
A muslim from Kenya won the US election. And one of the semifinalists used to see Russia from her window which I guess is possible only if someone lived in Russia. The third guy used to bang hot Vietnamese women while bombing their men so he is part Vietnamese.

And someone will win the World series if you ASK them to play in it.

Grant said...

mq - yes, I voted despite the paucity of J-bunnies on the ballot.

joe - we'll add it to my drive to lower the anal sex age of consent down to 13 for Asian schoolgirls.

tracy - I'm facing a shortage of tasteful lesbian J-bunny schoolgirl pics. Since you live in J-bunny central, please send more.

nyd - a more intelligent person could find a way to respond with a double-entendre involving the word "poll" (pole), but it's too early so you're on your own.

pbs - they're the front-runners of the Hello Kitty party.

eotr - yes, we are. Why doesn't the rest of the world automatically see it that way?

ssc - I don't yet have their names and I don't think the ballot would accept "Random J-bunnies" as a valid choice.

sj - I just naturally assumed that the entire world is invited to play baseball with us, but you all suck so bad you never show.

Martini said...

Don't Kang & Kodos count? "Go ahead, throw away your vote! It's a two-party system!" Oh right. That wasn't real.