Wednesday, January 12, 2011

Common Courtesy, Revisited

So, many holiday days have come and gone and I've not heard from many of you. It's probably because, unlike me, you still have lives when you get more than three feet away from a computer (I think that's a kilowatt or a looney for you non-Americans). I'm not whining about a lack of attention, by which I mean I'm whining about a lack of attention plus some other stuff. It brings to mind a not so recent death, that of the thank you note. Although I give gifts with no expectations of netting any return, it is nice to be thanked. In my case, it's not because I'm trading swag for head pats. I'm just worried that whatever I've given has been lost in the mail / Internet (read this post if you think that unlikely). So, if you don't mind, send me a note or leave me a comment if you received anything from me after 2010-12-01. Otherwise I have to ask if you got my gift, and that makes me feel like a complete twat. I much prefer my normal setting, which is to feel like a partial twat.

Part of why I obsess is because I was preached to give gifts with no expectations, which I followed religiously until I sent a friend a box of Godiva chocolates in the early aughts. She was normally good about thanking me, but then she wasn't. I felt like a total crud, but during a late night girl chat (I give good girl) I asked if she liked the gift. She mentioned they had been having the house renovated for some time, put me on hold, then returned and gushed over the moldering box with the petrified goodies she didn't dare eat. And now I worry.

Okay, seriously, my concern here is that I've sent several gifts / Paypal donations / offers to marry me (bunnies only) but I'm not sure if anyone received them. I love being generous, but not when it's lost in the mail and nobody benefits. So please rescue me from being a twat by somehow telling me if I've been nice to you over the last two months. And if you think I'm upping my twattish potential by asking for feedback, send me a bunny as feedback. And if you make a living by calling people during suppertime or visiting their homes to sell your religion, please die.


Avitable said...

I've gotten gifts from you and pretty sure I've emailed you every time. Even if I didn't get my damn Christmas card from you because of this mysterious post where you wanted people to sign up and I somehow missed it. Thank you for being generous, but I'm still not going to let you fuck me in the ass.

Tracy Lynn said...

I'm pretty sure you have been nice to me over the past two months, but I am also fairly sure that I have been nicer to you than I am to most people. If I have neglected you in any way, let me know and I will pay more attention to you. At which point you may regret this whole business.
I will also not let you fuck me in the ass.

dr.alistair said...

the hello kitty vibrator i recieved from you was broken.

Was that a message?

and my ass is exit only.

Anonymous said...

Dear Grant,
Have you noticed I'm completely out of my element on your blog? You seem to tolerate me, so I keep coming back. Like a puppy, just takes a little whistle or a cookie or just the promise of a cookie.
Anyway, I did receive 3 electronic cards from you. The first I trashed because I thought it was spam. I didn't connect the "Grant" with you although you are the only Grant I know. I distrust, it's my nature.
The second e-card, I did send you a thank you for, because it was so funny and I looked at it and I knew who it was from!
The third e-card for New Year's I looked at and laughed and then never sent you a thank you. The honest truth is, I thought my thank you's might be perceived as pandering or an over eagerness to be your blog buddy. I've found that with some people, less is more and I figured you for one of those people.
After reading today's post, I think maybe I should have sent that thank you email. Perhaps you enjoy pandering and are OK with an over eager blogging "buddy". We are buddies, right?
Too eager? Sigh, I'm really torn. I'm not even sure you're being serious here.
Thank you!!!! For any future gifts of any form, I will thank you without fear of retribution or being labeled a suck up. That's OK, right?

Captain Dumbass said...

I always get a good laugh out of your ecards but never respond with one of my own because I'm an asshole like that. I did get the light sabers and magnets and I'm sure I sent a thank you email. If you haven't got the bunny-in-a-box I sent by now, don't answer the door the next time FedEx knocks on the door.

unmitigated me said...

You haven't sent me shit. And, NO, you may not fuck me in the ass, either. Although I'd pay money to see you do that to Avitable.

Kira said...

...actually, I'd pay money to see you do that to Avitable, too....

Not only did I say thank you, but my kids said thank you, too. Or is it the midget actors I hired? Hmm. You decide.

tiff said...

I'd pay too, but only if Avitable wears the outfit in his profile pic.

Oh, and thanks for the ecard. And the dead puppy. That was a nice touch. He was delicious.

Maundering mutterer said...

I mailed you a big thank you in December, and added a grateful thank you comment to your blog too. I also mentioned the marvelous books you sent in my blog... What I'M concerned about is weather the package I sent YOU is where it's supposed to be. Europe have had theirs weeks ago.

Maundering mutterer said...

PS: 'Whether' (I hate typos).. do tell!

metalmom said...

I received every ecard and you know they always make me laugh. I also got the penis pictures but I assumed they were from Adam and thanked him.

I would let you fuck my ass, however in my case, I mean my donkey.

Maundering mutterer said...

Bloody hell. Check your mail, your comments and REPLY. HAVE YOU GOT YOUR THANKYOUS (dated 16 Dec or thereabout) AND - more imprtantly - YOUR PACKAGE? It cost me a bomb to send that package, you know. There were more stamps on it than I've ever seen in my life....

Grant said...

Avitable - you always send an e-thank you, which is why I started worrying when you didn't. Just got the refund too.

Tracy Lynn - I'm pretty sure you've responded every time I got you something, which did not include Xmas on my part because I'm evil.

dr.alistair - call their 24 hour HK vibrator help line.

PAMO - sending a thank you for an e-card is going above and beyond the call of duty. I was worried about the physical things because I already had some stuff lost in the mail this year.

Captain Dumbass - good news, the mail just found your missing package dated late November and delivered it yesterday. You'll get it when I feel like going to the post office again.

unmitigated me - I'd also pay Avitable for that. Let's pool our resources.

Kira - that's three then. We should be able to convince him now.

tiff - that was supposed to be a dead cat. Lousy 3rd party vendors.

Maundering mutterer - just got the package - thank you!

metalmom - yes, I always outsource my Penising to Adam.

Anonymous said...

Oh. Well- it felt like more of a commitment than I was ready to make anyway. :-))

Lady Tragic said...

You visit my blog and I'm a horrible friend, you're more than appropriately nice to me!