Wednesday, August 18, 2010

I drew a picture for you

Below is my depiction of Jesus jousting with a mermaid with giant toothbrushes while riding T-Rexes. (I include the text description in case your monitor is low-res, or you can't see very well, or you're drunk, or stupid.)

Artist's notes - the scene is depicted at midnight beneath storm clouds under the new moon. If you can't see Jesus and the mermaid clearly, it's because they are surrounded by hoards of cheering dobermans, crows, ravens, and black bears. Because, really, that sort of thing tends to draw a crowd.

Next week's art - under the lemon yellow sun, bands of Japanese samurai with golden helms riding palominos attack a group of Buddhist monks with lemons and urine.


Jay said...

You're just so damn talented. This should be hanging in a museum somewhere.

Avitable said...

You are the next Picasso. Not Pablo Picasso, this guy Bob Picasso I know, who's homeless and sleeps in a cardboard box in downtown Orlando.

Monogram Queen said...

Call me blind but all I saw was a black blob...........

Mighty Hunter said...

I was actually hoping for a representation of Siberian tigers running down white swans on a frozen, snow-covered tundra during a white-out blizzard while polar bears frolic in the background.

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Captain Dumbass said...

I think the picture would be cooler if Jesus were riding the mermaid and the T.Rex was raping Anonymous.

Maundering mutterer said...

Where are the bunnies?
Well, if you won't maintain standards, I'll have to post a picture of something wet and sexy.

Grant said...

Jay - the Gugenheim is hanging a monitor displaying my blog even now.

Avitable - you think one day I could have my very own cardboard box? I didn't know you viewed me with such high regard. I will try to live up to your unreasonable expectations.

Monogram Queen - true art is never appreciated by the masses during the artist's time.

Mighty Hunter - don't be silly. That would just look like a white square. Leave art to the professional database technology people.

Anonymous - can I just wire you some money to a Nigerian account in exchange for Viagara instead?

Captain Dumbass - I'll add Jesus riding the mermaid to my next work of art which will depict bald Native Americans on Mars slaughtering the tomato people. Jesus and pal will be behind the apples.

Maundering mutterer - flower porn. W00t!

Coal Miner's Granddaughter said...

I can totally see the detail in this picture, because I have night vision as well as X-Ray vision. I'm badass that way. BTW, great artwork! I can totally see the anguish in Jesus' face and the glint of mischief in the mermaid's eyes. GENIUS!

Grant said...

Coal Miner's Granddaughter - it's nice to be appreciated by a true art lover.