BS Continues

Before returning to my dating woes (yes – the suspense continues), I’m first going to rant about something much more serious than a lack of a love life – no connection to the Internet.

I cancelled my BS phone service because I almost never make phone calls (just the odd pizza delivery) and the line quality was so bad voice communication was nearly impossible, dial-up Internet connections didn’t connect long enough to be useful, and DSL only worked at an eighth of its promised speed when it worked at all. So, I replaced their crappy service with a cheap Virgin USA mobile phone and Charter cable / Internet service. I initially signed up for their Internet service only, then questioned them when I later discovered that my monthly rate would be more expensive than advertised; their publicized monthly rate assumed I would also have cable service with them. I asked about cable service and said I would add it ONLY if it didn’t require another installation fee and the monthly rate was acceptable. Their price fit my budget and they assured me both installations would be covered by the same installation fee.

Life was great for a whole week – Cartoon Network and fast access that was actually fast. Then the following week my Internet connection had a coronary and their tech-support couldn’t discover the reason. Our conversation (at eighteen cents a minute on the mobile phone I had planned to only use for the odd pizza delivery) sounded like this:
Tech-Support: Okay, I’ve reset your modem. Do you see the flashing light?
Me: No.
TS: Umm…okay, unplug it and plug it back in. The light should be flashing now. Is it?
Me: No.
TS: Umm…

After a half-hour, the connection abruptly began to work in the middle of his next bright idea. He had no idea why it happened, but since it was working he couldn’t troubleshoot any further and so we parted ways. I sacrificed a chipmunk to the connection gods in the hopes they would be appeased. It failed again the next morning, but was working again in the afternoon before I could call again.

Since then, it has been up and down at odd times. Sometimes resetting the modem works, sometimes not. While fighting this and topping off my never-to-be-used phone, I received my first cable bill and it was a whopping FIVE TIMES what I expected. Reading further, I discovered:
1) the bill was for the next two months of service, which didn’t bother me.
2) they were charging me for two separate installations, which did bother me.
3) the monthly cable rate they disclosed to me only covered the extended channels, which don’t come without the basic channels and a lot of little fees which nearly doubled the overall price.

In order to spare myself an extra phone charge, I sent them an e-mail describing my billing issue, saying I wouldn’t have ordered cable if they had told me the actual costs up front but I was willing to keep it without further complaint if they would at least remove the second installation fee in accordance with our agreement (I’d rather not give up Bobobo-bo Bo-bobo). Two days later – no response.

Last night a storm knocked out power (but not cable) in my apartment, but thanks to a battery backup on my PC I was able to keep working long enough to safely shut it down. Hours later when the power was restored, I rebooted only to discover the cable modem was once again down and not responding to any attempts to revive it. I called TS yet again, was told I’d have a helluva wait, and then was assisted by a maddeningly friendly computer. The computer stepped me through all the basic steps I had already done on my own, then announced the problem couldn’t be solved by computer and I had to speak to an actual person after a long and expensive wait. I watched TV while I waited for the actual person to come on the line, then muted it when he did.

He started troubleshooting my problem, beginning with asking for my name and number again and putting me through the exact same procedures as the computer before him despite my objections. We reached the point where the computer had bowed out, and then…

And then the cable abruptly died. Naturally, he said “Oh, I’m showing an outage in your area. I can’t do anything until it’s resolved, and I can’t enter the ticket for you. I’m going to transfer you to another operator who can handle this priority request.” Just try to convince me he didn’t pull the plug himself just to get me off the line. Anyway, he cheerily forwarded my call, and then…

And then I found myself listening to the computer again, who told me we needed to start with the basics. NOOOOOOOOO!!! I hung up the phone and went to bed. There are too many people where I live for a cable outage to go unnoticed, and I did more than my fair share of phone work last night.

I awoke early in the morning and checked the cable – back on. Thinking 5:30 AM would be a good time to call their so-called tech-support, I called again and the computer told me I’d have an even longer wait. I gave up and went back to bed.

So, I now have expensive cable I didn’t really want, no Internet connection, a large phone bill, and a gigantic cable bill which I’m not going to pay until they fix the service and at least remove the added connection charge. My future Internet choices are: keep working with Charter in the hopes they’ll eventually provide me with the service they’re overcharging me for, crawl back to BS and their crappy service, purchase $50,000 worth of liability insurance (stipulated in my lease) so I can get a digital satellite service, or go with no Internet connection at all. Option four is looking pretty good at this point. At least I’ll get what I’m paying for.

Anyone who wants give me more of your useless guidance is welcome to leave a comment. I could use a good laugh at this point. Hopefully your need to wallow in my misery is sated and you can stop giving me bad dating advice.