Tuesday, May 02, 2006

In Dreams

Again, I may have posted this before and forgotten. I have mentioned this dream to a few of you before in your comments, not because it’s the strangest or even close to being the scariest dream I’ve ever had, but because it’s the easiest to summarize. I’ll post the (slightly) longer version here.

In the dream, I was in a shoe store in a mall in Texas when I wondered where the back door would lead me. I assumed it would be into the inner workings of the mall – maintenance corridors, that sort of thing – but to satisfy my curiosity I looked around for the clerks, saw none, and slipped out the back.

I found myself standing in deep space, amidst a field of stars, gaping as comets and other debris flamed past. I looked to my left and there stood Darth Vader, flanked by a pair of roaring twenties goons complete with pinstriped suits, spats, and tommy guns. They approached; the two thugs took hold of my arms as Vader informed me that I had intruded on his realm and must be dealt with accordingly. He pulled out something that looked like part syringe and part glue gun, and then injected my face with hot fudge.

My mug swelled like a cooking sausage, and I ran back into the mall when the goons loosened their grip. I could feel the fudge spreading beneath my skin, sticky and hot, entering into my bloodstream, and I knew instinctively that I had less than twelve hours to live. I hopped in my Honda Civic and drove as fast as I could for Alabama in the hopes I could reach my family in time to say goodbye.

On the way, a Texas state trooper pulled me over and demanded an explanation. I told him about Darth Vader injecting my face with chocolate and how I was about to die, but he seemed skeptical. He probably didn’t trust anybody who didn’t drive American, but I awoke at that point and didn’t get to see how it ended (other than me dying, that is).

Yeah! Put that in your pipe and smoke it, Freud-dude.

32 comments:

Enemy of the Republic said...

You can't die in your dreams. Once you die, you are really dead.

I've never been to Texas--are the cops as bad as Chicago or L.A.?

Darth Vader is very cool. But he wouldn't last a day in Philly. I guess I am dancing around in order to say that I don't get your dream.

Tai said...

mmm fudge mmmm

fatty ~ said...

damn the texas state trooper...

-HOT FUDGE KILLS-

so good yet gooooo bad

fatty ~ said...

YAY! header back!

Doug Murata said...

How do we know that if we die in our dreams then we die in real life? Where is the proof?

Open space represents the truth. The back door to the shoe store is someplace you weren't supposed to go (i.e. "Authorized personnel only!") Once you stepped past the boundary and saw the realm of truth, those who would keep the truth from you (i.e. the Government ... er ... I mean Darth Vader,) used his administration ... erm ... thugs to prevent you from actually seeing any of the truth. Finally, to add insult to injury, a storm trooper ... I mean state trooper pulls you over before you can inform your loved ones of your fate and say goodbye.

This means that George Bush is going to inject hot fudge into our faces! Then, he's going to build the Death Star and blow up Alderaan. The Democrats will start dabbling with mystical energies (very un-Christian,) and will eventually create a knight out of, well, it would be one of the Bush girls, so it's not a perfect analogy. Let's just say that the Democrats will make a Jedi and the Republican party will go up in a fiery explosion while in orbit around a small forest moon inhabited by teddy bears.

The end!

Okami said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Okami said...

Ooh - Doug - I like it! Just enough to border copyright law and integrate every present governmental conspiracy theory...

Grant: Really? Fudge? In your face? Sounds more like a bad euphemism for something...but interesting that you would share the story with us... thanks!

patti_cake said...

Hmmm fudge injected into the face. In MY dreams I dive naked into a vat of fudge!

Saur♥Kraut said...

OK, I'm a counselor and even *I* give up on this one. You're on your own interpreting it. I wouldn't have any ideas where to begin. This is truly one of the most unique ones I've ever heard of, and it's my conjecture that it's pure fantasy: i.e., it means nothing whatsoever.

Wendy C. said...

I sometimes inject fudge just for effect...oh, no wait! That's Cosmopolitans...I forgot :-)

Wendy C. said...

Just for kicks I tried to research your dream on dreamhawk.com

No chocolate, no fudge...no Darth Vader, but here is what they said about injections:

INJECT/INJECTION Feeling other people's's opinions and will forced on you. There is often sexual meaning involved, so it could be simple sex, forced sex, or influences taken in during sexual relationship.

messiah said...

you weren't wearing your princess leia costume again, were you?

Enemy of the Republic said...

How do we know that we don't die in our dreams? Through countless sleep studies and dream statistics. We may dream that we die and go to hell, but we can't dream that we simply die because our mind (unconscious which is always protecting the ego) cannot accept that we cease to exist. It doesn't mean that we can't be atheists or whatever in everyday conscious life, but our unconscious in protecting the ego through intense dream symbolism won't allow it.

I hope that made sense.

Mel said...

You can dream you have died - if you're starring in Six Feet Under - umm, not to say I have! My God, Nate Fisher has dreamy hands...

JohnB said...

at least you didn't drive away in a Tercel

Liz said...

I will have to bill your insurence $150 to anaylize that for you. :P

fatty ~ said...

the dream isn't that hard to understand in third person.

You noticed something of interest that you wanted to explore. Well, you wanted to peek.
But when you did look, you were confronted with a 'universe' apart. It was however, hostile. You feel like you've been targeted for something unknown - but it maybe... not how you expected?

Your life is being lost in your dream but i think it's in your mind. Something of yourself is being lost - but u dont want to hold onto it.

The state trooper - he's 'people'. People who keep saying your crazy, or don't believe you.

[thats just how i read it]

GirlGoyle said...

Death by chocolate. WAy to go!! If this is the type of dream you are having lately (makes me wonder wtf Darth V. is doing in a shoe store!!)you might want to lay off the fish for a while. Might be initial signs of mercury poisoning dude. LOL

Seven said...

Hey, I knew a kid in school we used to call 'fudge-face'. I hadn't thought about him in years.
Hid dad owned a shoe store that specialized in throwback gangster shoes.
Really.
Wonder what happened to him? Somebody said he moved to Alabama and had a kid named Grant.

PBS said...

That is a really unique dream! But they're difficult to interpret for other people because the symbolism is also unique to each person, it's what does "fudge" Darth Vader, etc mean to YOU.

But since I love dreams I'll give it a shot. Sounds like someone is injecting lies or "fudging." Darth Vader and the troopers are authority figures. The back door is the unknown or unexplored.

Or your dream could just be about sex, homoerotic subconscious leanings! Lots of dreams go where we wouldn't ever go in real life. You pick which interp you like better!

Kira said...

This dream is easy to interpret: Grant thinks Asian women are incredibly hot. See? I should do this for a living!

The Stiltwalker said...

next time you sleep let me know. I'd like to be there for the ride...my dreams are boring as hell.

Joe said...

Whenever i have a dream like that, I just keep repeating "Look at all the little fishes" until I calm down.

That said, your dream is clearly about the lingering effects of racism in the south. Not really, but I'm interested in seeing how people react to that interpretation.

Angie said...

Wow, so many interpretations. I just think you ate something toxic before you went to sleep...a gastrointestinal acid trip, if you will.

Kerry said...

you're a weird dreamer too! *hugs*

I got stuck in The Exorcist (the movie) in my dream the other night and i really wanted to blog bout it but i cant cuz the flippin host has our site locked down cuz some jerkass hacked in and did some damage and they are trying to repair.

SJ said...

After the previous post wher you had sake you have this kinda dream... see a connection?

Grant said...

enemy - I've never been to LA, but the cops are as bad as in Chicago (just in a different way). My main problem in Chicago was that I willfully and persistently drove while being Southern (pickup truck and everything).

tai - fudge rulz! I meant fish - fecking Westerners and your fattening foods.

fatty - yeah, I'm with a new hosting service (although I've already experienced outtages and am thinking of moving on).

doug - okay, yeah, if you want to go for the simple explanation, I guess that works. :p

okami - somehow in the dream, the fudge was poisonous to me. I've had enough in real life to prove otherwise.

patt_cake - I like your version better.

saur kraut - I tend to think we overanalyze our dreams. I agree that this one was just a tale my brain spun to keep itself occupied.

wendy - cosmos are also good. Why not try the two combined? Also, I think the experts over-interpret the amount of erotic imagery in our dreams.

messiah - no, it was at the cleaners. I was sleeping in my Chewbacca underoos. :p

enemy - makes sense, but I have to disagree since I have dreamed of dying (and not going to hell or anything). I'll post more on that later.

mel - does the show prominently feature an Asian woman?

johnb - the Civic was actually my car at the time - probably the only real thing in the dream, besides Darth Vader (who is real).

liz - the joke's on you. I don't have psychiatric insurance, so you're just going to have to take cash.

fatty - that's probably the most accurate serious interpretation of all, although I'm still not convinced it actually meant anything.

girlgoyle - that was in my pre-Japanese days, when what I needed to lay off was the whiskey.

rick - couldn't be me since I was born in Kentucky, one of two states that consistently ranks below Alabama in education.

pbs - I like your thinking. It means I'm destined to marry a Japanese woman.

kira - you win the top prize! Which is absolutely nothing. Take your attagirl and go home.

stiltwalker - it must be because your life is so exciting your sleeping brain can't compete. =)

joe - as soon as my sheets come back from the cleaners, I will go to New York and burn a lower-case letter "t" in your presence.

angie - it does sound like a pepperoni and black olive dream to me.

kerry - hopefully your server will be back on its feet soon. Definitely post the dream then.

sj - actually, this is an old dream, probably brought on by bourbon and pizza.

hellbunny said...

I wonder why you injected the fudge in your dream!!!!!!

BBB_0202020 said...

im scared of texas rangers every since chuck norris was one on t.v.

Doug Murata said...

enemy: You're wrong! You need to die! You need to die and go to Hell! (I'm kidding. I like you!) My brother has claimed to have died in his dreams, but I'm not sure what the aftermath was. I suppose I was wondering how he knew he died. If he experienced some sort of out-of-body experience, it would be similar to your statement about dying and going to some sort of afterlife, right?

There's the rub. If you've died in a dream, how do you know? You've utterly ceased to exist. If you know you're dead, then you can't be truly dead according to this definition, right? When you put it that way, it's a pretty solid argument that you can't die in your dreams.

Grant said...

hellbunny - because I didn't want to do it in real life.

tigerkiss - but Walker was one of the good guys. You must be some criminal mastermind. :p

doug - check today's post, but when I die in my dreams everything goes black and I wake up.

Tracy Lynn said...

Grant, I would like to point out that fudge doesn't kill people, Vader kills people. Blame not the fudge.

A message from the NFA ( National Fudge Association)