Group number 236,934: people who deliberately take up more than one parking space. You know the type – overly proud of their crappy little cars, they try to keep the doors safe from the ding gnomes by parking in the middle of two spaces. I have no problem with people who pull that dickhead maneuver in the back of the parking lot, but we have way too many people at work who arrive early and take more than their share of prime spaces. Somebody where I work owns a Mini Cooper and parks this, the shortest vehicle in the world, across FOUR parking spaces.
I think I’ll start parking as close to them as possible, with less than a micron of clearance on their driver’s side. If I could only get together a team of people with giant white pickups to surround their vehicles until they learn some manners, the world would be a better place. Until that happens I’ll stick with my current plan, which involves homemade napalm.
- Flame, out