Tomorrow is Thanksgiving in this country (U.S.A.), or as I like to call it, Thursday. I hate the holidays because all of my friends are on family patrol, so they pack up and abandon me. But instead of doing a whiny bitchy post (too late), I decided to do the traditional thing and list all for which I am thankful. I am thankful…
- …for Japanese restaurants, because without them I’d be alone and hungry tomorrow.
- …for the native Americans, because if we didn’t steal their land I wouldn’t have anywhere to keep my stuff.
- …that we won WWII since the treaty stipulates that, at any time of my choosing, I can go to Japan, pocket a tiny Asian woman (where woman = female 12yo or older), bring her back home and make her my anal sex slave. I didn’t wiki this, I’m just assuming it’s in the treaty because I can’t think of any other reason for WWII.
- …that we defeated Korea and Vietnam for the same reasons. War on Thailand, anyone?
- …for His Satanic Majesty, the High Lord Lucifer, that he gives me religious alternatives to the smothering wave of xtian hypocrites that are fecking up our nation.
- …for my penis, or as I like to refer to it, my built-in amusement park.
- …mostly for you, my blogpals, for giving me something to do at work besides work. You are all truly great and appreciated. (ha ha dumb fuckers will believe anything oh wait you’re still typing stop dude stop)