Wednesday, March 08, 2006

Bunny Dumped

This week sensei-usagi had time to fit me in on Tuesday night, so I took my private lesson then instead of Friday. Bear in mind that I don’t mind the Friday class, but the traffic is horrible. Last week it took me nearly an hour to drive the twelve miles home.

I’ve always thought my Japanese language teacher didn’t like me for some reason. I get the hardest questions in class, and she never compliments me like she does the others when I answer correctly. During our private sessions, she repeats my answers after I’ve said them. I asked her if I misspoke a few times, but she always said “No, you got it right” and left it at that. I thought I was blowing things out of proportion, but then after class last night I asked her if she still had me down for Friday as well. I didn’t want another lesson this week, but since they have a 24 hour cancel or pay policy similar to a medical office I wanted to be sure I wasn’t double-booked. She told me that she’s no longer available for private courses as she booked a pair of girls in my place.

Quick question – does anybody know how to scream “Bitch!” in Japanese?

I wonder why she hates me so. Despite plenty of opportunity I haven’t throttled her, not once, not even last night when she told me to say “Give me those pretty shoes.” Note to sensei – I will never need to say that in any language, doumo aragato. I’ve never been rude to her, or ogled her any more than I would any other Asian usagi (and I’m very subtle at that as well). Sure, she seemed off-put when I asked for a hug, and she didn’t like it when I tried to measure her for my hibachi grill, and she didn’t care for any of my suggested additions to the list of standard phrases like “Give me head or I’ll cleave you in twain” (it was probably the word “twain” that threw her), but dumping me was just rude, not to mention the fact that she wasn’t even going to inform me to my face. She told me that the institute had another teacher I could contact, as if telling somebody they’re still allowed to date other people will soften the blow of ditching them.

I may have to reconsider our relationship. There’s not a lot of meat on her bones, but then again I have been meaning to eat more rice anyway. The Japanese view meat as a side dish anyways.

See? I have learned something after all.


Tai said...

Aw Grant...maybe she felt she was getting to emotionally involved with you and felt the need to back away, you know, to be more professional.

(I'm just tryin' to help!)

circe said...

For the life of me I cannot imagine why she didn't fall head over heels for ya, Grant. Well, don't give up hope. There are plenty of Asian fish in the sea.....this was just practice....

april said...

Maybe she's a lesbian? You did say she replaced you with girls....

Lesbians don't like men.

OR maybe Tai is right, she starting to have feelings for you and didn't know how to handle it and pushed you away.

You didn't have any boogers hanging out of your nose or anything, did you?

Or maybe she's come across your blog never know.

Either way, fuck that douche!! I told you I heard she used her teeth during bj's.

Mel said...

It's because she had enough of you saying 'Origato' and then giggling like a teenage girl - it's because you drift off in class and picture her living with you in your SIM palace - and lastly, it's because you never invited her out to Red Lobster for dinner - for shame!

Kerry said...

Those Asian chicks are weird anyways. I think the lack of protein affects their thinking power.

doc-t said...

I think Tai's right as well.

Let's go with... She likes you too much. She's attracted to you and she can't control it. So she goes the other extreme and pretends she hates you...

Mel... asian chicks are actually.... well pretty nice!

just not this one.

By the way, i don't think there is a direct translation for the word "bitch" as we mean it.

but I doubt it needs translating. it's one of those universally understood words...

Use it wisely!

hey what part of atlanta are you in?

Kira said...

Don't take her shit, Grant. Beat her into unconsciousness with a club, then drag her by her hair off to your lair of love.

Melissa said...

She could read your mind and kept seeing herself as a belt... you offended her fashion sensibilities, she wanted to be shoes. Duh.

Anonymous said...

as i have some asian background - i will vouch for us being cool sexy and totally hot!

ummm grant - ur obsessed...

is there a little sexual tension in your relationship (or a lot?) because that's probably pretty off-putting for her.

PBS said...

What a shame that she left you. Maybe she has a teacher/friend who'd take up where she left off?

pink said...

Maybe her husband saw her giving you private lessons one night and he got jealous.Thats why shes got females instead now. Seriously though did you by any chance give her the impression that you only wanted to book a few lessons so shes filled your place with someone else now.It does seem a little strange her just doing that without warning.

Joe said...

Clearly she's in love with you and could no longer put herself through the pain of being near you and not having you. The teacher/student relationship is a sacred one, after all.

TTD said...

an hour for 12 miles!! that's crazy..

sorry u got dumped.. maybe the next teacher will be nicer to you

Leesa said...

Perhaps she is playing hard to get. But she is playing it too well.

Grant said...

tai - thanks. Keep up the happy, thoughts.

circe - I too fail to see why all women don't love me unconditionally. However, after two decades of this, I think I'm beginning to sense a pattern.

april - actually I'm okay with the teeth thing as long as she doesn't leave permanent damage. A little scarring is okay - something to show the kinds and brag about.

mel - who needs Red Lobster when you've got a coupon to the Waffle House?

kerry - I've heard people say some women have their brains in their bra, which would explain her confusion. What's smaller than an A cup?

doc-t - I'm in Marietta, the cool part of town. Of course, any part I'm in is cool. :p

kira - she won't allow me to bring my club to class anymore. Apparently she knows that one.

melissa - she's pretty small, so I don't know if I'll be able to get enough material from her for a pair of shoes. Strappy sandals maybe, but boots are right out.

aka fatty - there is definitely tension there, although I don't think it's sexual in nature. I've noticed that by the end of class, I've gone from lightly resting an arm on the table to stiff-arming it like it's about to attack.

pbs - she did mention another available teacher, also a woman, but I have no idea what she looks like.

pink - seriously, we just had an informal agreement to meet weekly. I was e-mailing a request to her weekly, but she was just automatically writing me into her schedule. The two girls are a better deal for her since she now has two students booked for two hours instead of me for one. The only thing that slightly irritated me is that she didn't mention she was cancelling my class until I asked for confirmation.

joe - yes, clearly. If she hooked up with me, she might lose her job - especially after I told everybody where she works and rented the billboard.

ttd - actually, I'm still seeing her as part of the group on the weekends. I think I'll just stick with the classroom instruction for now and schedule another tutor if I feel lost again (which will probably happen the next time).

leesa - yes, the spiky heels in the groin and the taser to the face were a tad discouraging, but I'm sure its all part of the Japanese courtship ritual.

Weary Hag said...

Is there an adequate translation for the dreaded "C" word in Japanese?