Tuesday, December 27, 2005

Disaster Planning

My divorce letter should be arriving at my mother's in a day or so and I'm hoping that will end that chapter of my life forever, but as Liz reminded me I'll need to have a contingency plan in case my mother appears uninvited on my doorstep. I've already decided that she's not coming inside for any reason - it will be easier to keep her out than to remove her once she's entrenched. Talking to her will do no good as she'll just twist words and draw out the confrontation as long as possible - if it's her last chance to be a pain, she'll play the role of victim and make the most of it. If she just wants to rail at me, I'll set a time limit of five minutes and let her run her mouth. When the five minutes are up, the door gets shut in her face. If she still won't go away, I'll just grab a few things, drive until I feel that she isn't following me anymore, and stay the night in a hotel. I'm hoping it doesn't go beyond that. I really don't relish the thought of attempting to procure a restraining order on her.

Any suggestions on how else to handle this matter? I've already considered violence (pretty much every day of my entire life) but I would hate to go to prison over this because it would give her the last laugh.

8 comments:

Spider Girl said...

Ah, family ties. They just don't make things less complicated.

Probably avoidance IS the best tactic.

Liz said...

This maybe over simplistic for her, but what about just not answering the door. Make sure all the shades are closed so she can’t see in. You could even leave a note on the door addressed to her. It could read something like you have said everything you want to say please do not come to your home again and you have left town just to avoid her.

Your idea to have a bag in the car to take to a hotel is good too. I wouldn’t give her the opportunity to say anything though. It could make her more likely to come back when she gets new idea to confront you with. Just get in the car and take off. Like you said, if she gets in the house getting her out might be difficult. Hopefully you won’t have to deal with her at all.

annush said...

divorce letter?

i recall reading about atomic chickens, satan, ninja bunny dentists, satan, killing people, satan, nanowrimo, satan, among other things but not once do I recal reading about that...hmmmmmmmm

Stacy The Peanut Queen said...

As some famous Englishmen running thru the countryside once wailed:

Run away! Run away!!!

I think Liz had an excellent idea with the "not answering the door". That's what I do when someone comes to my door that I don't want to see...:)

sands of time said...

You could move and not give her your new address if the not answering the door doesnt work.

Valkyrie said...

Be aware that she might wait a week or so to catch you off guard.

I'm with Liz. Just leave a note if she shows up and don't answer the door.

Valkyrie said...

Oh, and if you feel it necessary, change your phone number.

Mel said...

Makes you appreciate the telephone and snail mail - that way you can hang up and any paperwork is delivered by your postie. If your ma gets in your face and wouldn't listen to reason, you don't have to put up with it - you can remove yourself from that situation by just walking away from her - if she follows walk some more. Just leave - good luck Grant...