Software Solution

While watching Menno’s Mind (don’t bother) last night, I came up with an idea for a great game/productivity enhancer. It’s called Virtual Killing Spree ™. It has no goals, no time limit, no rules, no big baddies at the end of the level, and in fact it has no levels at all. You just wander through a virtual landscape killing people as you see fit until you feel better about yourself. The deluxe version would allow you to add photos of coworkers and scan the floor layout of your cube farm for a little personalized fun. Just think – you deal with your coworkers’ stupidity as best you can for half the morning and just before you blow your stack and go on a real killing spree, you simply bring up the VKS ® Deluxe Edition, spend your break drinking Mountain Dew and mowing down your colleagues, then return to work feeling refreshed and relieved.

Virtual Suicide © is another great idea, especially for those of us who, several times a day, desperately want to blow our heads off but don’t want to deal with the tedium of being eternally dead. If anyone knows of a good PC game that incorporates either of these ideas (wanton carnage without morals or unnecessary challenges), please let me know. If not, I say we launch our own software development company to cater to this unmet need.

Death, out